To be afraid of something is to give it power over you; you are its prisoner. The truth of this is quite obvious when you observe a person's behavior who suffers only from a simple, specific fear. For example, if I were mortally afraid of dogs I would never risk walking through my own neighborhood (or anyone else's) to enjoy the crisp air of an autumn twilight. In a word, I would not be free to do it.

Imagine how difficult it is to even begin to assess the psychological consequences of living with such a diffuse, nameless, omnipresent fear as that of death by atomic bomb. Consider that everyone born since 1945 has to some degree and in some fashion been a "prisoner" because of that possibility. What does this do to people?

I once attended a workshop at Andover-Newton Theological School entitled "Ministering with Defense Industry Employees: An Interfaith Conference." Among the more interesting people I met there was a poet who had been suffering from writer's block for two years. Her three sons, I think, personified the possible ways of responding to the nuclear threat. Her oldest is active organizing anti-war demonstrations on his college campus. The middle son intends to head for open ground in the event of a terrorist nuclear bombing, so that the end will come quickly. And her youngest, an artist, refuses to deal with the whole issue. But he paints pictures expressive of chaos, death and destruction.

The process of becoming a Christian is of a piece with human spiritual maturation. Or, as it says in the Scriptures, "the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom." Only the fear of God may free, and not imprison, a person. The "fear of the Lord," that awe and wonder experienced by one who grows ever more intimately aware of the presence of God in Christ in the midst of life, liberates a person from the fears of the world, even from the fear of an unexpected death perpetrated by terrorists. Yet freedom from the grip of that horrible possibility is not to be indifferent to it. The "fear of the Lord" rather frees us to love our errant neighbor the more boldly, and to take risks that, in some significant (and even seemingly small) way, will make senseless violence in the world an impossibility. Just as there are Christians who are emboldened by “holy fear” to organize and participate in peace marches, so also there are Christian military men and women who can face death and engage in life threatening actions to prevent the advent of war because they are at peace with God.

Thus it is no mystery why the angels in heaven sang this hymn upon the birth of Christ:

"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace..." - Luke 2:14

Randy

"Do not be afraid; for see — I am bringing you good news of great joy for all the people: to you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is the Messiah, the Lord.” Luke 2:10-11

Holiday Celebrations in the Midst of Loss and Grief

To the bereaved it can be a time of sadness and loss as sights, sounds and smells remind us of those losses. As a way of coping with the sadness during these difficult times, some suggestions may be helpful.

First, be tolerant and compassionate with yourself. Grief is a process, not an event, and healing takes time. Don't be afraid to express your feelings of grief. Ignoring the grief will not make the pain go away and talking about it openly with caring friends and relatives will help ease those sad moments.

Respect your physical limits. You may feel fatigued and not as physically responsive. Lower your expectations and conserve your energy for the important things. Allow others to make dinner, entertain relatives, and do the shopping. Just filling time with activities to distract you from your loss can be counterproductive and exhausting. Spending personal moments with loved ones can be rewarding and therapeutic. Associate with those who understand and share your sense of loss and who encourage you to express your feelings, both happy and sad.

Include the person's name in your holiday conversation. Your wishes may differ from those well-meaning friends and relatives. Do not feel compelled to participate in activities that will cause you more stress and sadness.

Decide which family activities you want to continue and incorporate new ones you may want to begin. Plan your activities around those events. Avoid getting caught off guard by unexpected changes by planning ahead, but allow for changes you may feel are appropriate.

Embrace your memories. Instead of avoiding reminders of holidays past, share them with your family and friends. They may be your fondest and happiest moments and can bring laughter as well as tears.

Renew your resources for living. Loss of a loved one can encourage reflection of the meaning of our own lives and enable us to take inventory of our own contributions.

Expressing your faith is a natural part of this season. Attend holiday services or special religious observances.

Grief is both a necessity and a privilege and comes as a result of giving and receiving love. Don't let anyone take that away. Love yourself, be patient with yourself and surround yourself with loving, caring people. Keep each holiday as a reminder of all the things you shared with the person who has died. The remembering is part of the healing.

Submitted by Jennifer Laris

(Excerpted from "You and Your Grief during the Holiday Seasons," by Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt of the Center for Loss and Life Transition.)

Junior Warden’s Notes

This past year seems to have flown by so quickly. My time on the Vestry and being your Junior Warden is now coming to an end and it is time for a rest. I have enjoyed getting to know other Vestry members and hopefully creating some lasting friendships.

I like to have most of my Christmas shopping done by December, so I may utilize this time to reflect and enjoy the great holiday music being presented around us. Kitsap County has so much to offer, with exceptional talent, including what is within our own congregation. We at St Paul’s are blessed to have such great talent among us.

May I share a poem with you?

There's a brand new world outside my door,
A world I've never seen before,
A pure white world no foot has trod,
A world that still belongs to God.

A reverent world, where even trees
Are offering prayers on bended knees,
Their heads bowed low, till sun's caress
Shall bid them rise, His name to bless.

This virgin world before me lies
To make my own through loving eyes.
I drink it deep, so deep, and then
I give it back to God again.

By Clair Mitchell

Peace,
Marilyn Pantano
Junior Warden

Worship

The Liturgy and Arts Committee met on November 3rd. Topics ranged from a review of recent liturgies, to plans for Christmas services, and on to who will be covering Sunday morning services for Fr. Randy while he is on sabbatical from June to September 2003. There was discussion of getting enough people to be acolytes and chalice bearers, and extra training for the chalice bearers to back-up acolyte and reader functions.

Some dates to remember for the upcoming season – December 20th, an evening of Christmas caroling, and December 22nd, the greening of the church.

Things that will be different for people attending services will be: one chalice bearer at the 8 o’clock service, and a return to an earlier practice of having congregational singing during communion instead of an instrumental piece followed by a hymn.

Housekeeping items included “smoke alerts” for incense, how the Flower Guild is working successfully, and an upcoming training for ushers and greeters.

Members of the committee were also treated to a lively discussion with the Rev. Jerry Benjamin, a Presbyterian minister who worships at St. Paul’s from time to time. He shared the origins and practices of the “Kirking of the Tartans” service to be held November 17th at St. Paul’s, complete with bagpipes.

Under on-going issues, the committee agreed to look at the possibility of having some kind of service on September 11th each year, as well as what might be the best use of the space in the Narthex above the Sanctuary doors. The next meeting is February 2nd.

Sandy Stutey


Caroling Anyone? Caroling Everyone!

The season is steeped in song. This is the only time of year that society steps in to share with the community of faith. The songs of this liturgical season are heard in many secular venues, from beautifully produced concerts and television specials to the tinny, electronic background music in elevators and discount stores. Whatever one's faith tradition, it is impossible to escape the music of Christmas in America.

Come explore the joys of congregational singing. Pause this busy season to reflect on the importance of hymns and songs of faith for the members of our church and community. You are invited to join us at 5:00 pm on Friday Night, December 20th as we recapture the holy gift of prayer through song.

Why not invite a friend to come with you to St. Paul's? There's room for everyone! We will carol at Canterbury Manor, Bremerton Convalescent and Belmont Terrace. Hot Chocolate and Coffee will warm us in the Parish Hall when we return to St. Paul's as will the free Christmas organ recital in the Nave at 7:00 pm with special guests.

Looking forward to singing with you!

Cindy Holland

Christmas Pageant

The performance will be held during the 7:00 pm Christmas Eve service. For more information or if you want to volunteer to help, please contact Rusty Holland or Terrie Remick. Every one of all ages is welcome to participate!

Church Quiz

1. What is the Advent season in the Church year?

a. The season before Lent.
b. The first season of the Christian year.
c. The time between Christmas and New Year.

2. When does the Advent season begin?

a. The Sunday nearest March 1
b. The Sunday nearest January 1
c. The Sunday nearest November 30.

3. How long does the Advent season last?

a. 4 weeks
b. 5 weeks
c. 10 weeks

4. What is the color for the Advent season?

a. Purple
b. Green
c. Red

5. What are the colors of the candles in the Advent wreath?

a. 3 pink, 1 purple, 1 white
b. 3 purple, 1 pink, 1 white
c. 3 white, 1 pink, 1 purple

6. When is the Christmas season?

a. Christmas day to New Years day.
b. Christmas day to Epiphany.
c. The month of December.

7. What is the color for the Christmas season?

a. Green
b. White
c. Red

Members of St. Paul’s, and friends who want to put some finishing touches on their celebration of the Christmas season, are invited to help “green the church” on Sunday, December 22nd, following the 10:15 am service. If you will be coming to the church to help out, we should be underway by 11:45 am.

There will be a tree to put up, the large evergreen swag to hang over the altar as well as assorted wreaths and other greens, ribbons, and lights to put in place. Light refreshments will be available.

Dress casual, bring some gloves, and lend a hand. There’s something for everyone to do. Children are welcome to make this part of their Christmas celebration, too.

Can’t make the Sunday date? A group will be working on the 80 plus foot swag on Saturday, the 21st. Contact Sandy Stutey (692-4197) or Caro Dugan (377-8219) for more information or to volunteer.

Sandy Stutey

Odds & Ends

Fr. Bob Powers from Port Townsend will celebrate Eucharist on Thanksgiving Eve (November 27th at 7:00 pm) and on the first two Sundays of Advent.

Thursday morning services and the Bible Discussion Group will be in recess for two weeks (November 28th and December 5th). Deacon Cece and Dick Scott of St. Antony’s will be on hand for clergy related needs.

In the event of an emergency, please contact John Winesdorfer, Senior Warden (373-1192) or Marilyn Pantano, Junior Warden (692-5461).

Smoke Alert. We will be using incense at the 11:00 pm Christmas Eve service. We use a very fine grade of incense that doesn't seem to offend many people. The incense will only be used for the processions and at the beginning of the Eucharist. The rest of the time during the service the incense will be removed from the nave so as not to be offensive to anyone. We only use incense a few time each year at special services in keeping with the rich traditions of our Church.   Christian Formation. There will no Christian Formation classes on Sunday, December 29th. Classes will resume on January 5, 2003.

Calling all Young Adults! The St. Paul's Youth Group is in full swing. All 7th to 12th graders are invited to be part of the St. Paul's Youth Group. We meet on Wednesday's from 6:00 to 8:00 pm in the Youth Room at the Church. For further information contact Youth Leaders: Katie DeLapp, Leonard Accos, Emily Battin, Rebecca Battin, Holly Duncan, Jessie Duncan, Ashley Cooper, or Rusty Holland.

Holiday Hours. The church office will be closed from December 25th through January 1st. In the event of an emergency, please contact Fr. Randy on his cell phone (620-2376); John Winesdorfer, Senior Warden, (373-1192) or Marilyn Pantano, Junior Warden, (692-5461). Normal office hours will resume at 9:00 am on Thursday, January 2nd.

Around the Diocese

St. Paul’s in Port Townsend will host a Cookie Extravaganza on December 7th. Don’t worry about baking Christmas cookies this year - they will supply the container and you can select your favorite munchies. The fun will be held from 10:00 am to 2:00 pm in the Parish Hall. Other baked goods and crafts will be available for sale. The church is located at the corner of Tyler and Jefferson in Port Townsend.

Grounded in Faith, Growing in Spirit, Giving Thanks. As part of the 150th anniversary celebration, the Diocese of Olympia will sponsor five events next year. The 150th Anniversary celebration begins with an Anniversary Evensong on January 18th at St. Luke’s, Vancouver, the oldest parish in the diocese.

Life Planning

One issue I encounter in my work in Hospice is the problem of finding care giving. Most of us assume we will die suddenly or spend our final days in the hospital. This is not often the case. We also assume that a spouse or children will be there to care for us. As we live longer, our spouses age as well and are less able to give the physical and emotional care required. We are living in a sandwich generation, taking care of our children as well as our aging parents. Many people are able to recruit extended family but some live some distance away.

Hospice provides physical and emotional support in the form of home health aides to help with personal care, nurses who assess and teach, social workers who help with financial issues and counseling. There are also chaplains who help with spiritual issues, and volunteers who sit with patients while the primary caregiver takes a break.

Unless one is physically able or has family or friends to help, care giving becomes a real problem. Some people opt for nursing home care; for others, who prefer to remain at home, the only option is hired care, often costing between $10-$15 / hour. There are some long term care insurance policies that are becoming prevalent, but many only cover nursing home care. There are some that include in-home care giving that defrays the costs considerably.

Some people averse to nursing homes may prefer an adult family home, which operates on a smaller scale, has a home-like atmosphere, and gives more personal care. They are also less expensive than nursing homes. Possibly, in the near future, one can purchase a long term care policy that includes this care setting. In any case, it isn't a bad idea to set aside some money for this eventuality and stay on good terms with your relatives and children.

One thing you can do for yourself and your family is to fill out an Advance Directives or Living Will. This spells out your wishes for medical care and whether you wish aggressive measures, including resuscitation, artificial hydration, tube feeding, etc. when you are no longer able to provide these for yourself.

Another form that is advised is the Durable Power of Attorney. A Durable Power of Attorney is not the same as a Power of Attorney for financial matters. This one designates a person who is authorized to make medical decisions for you when you are no longer able to make these decisions for yourself. It can be a family member, a friend, an attorney or whomever you trust to speak for you. It is better if that person lives near you but as long as they can be reached by phone it can work.

As a side note, Hospice does provide medications by injection when it is the only method possible for administration and oxygen is given for comfort as needed.  

Jennifer Laris

Anniversary Quilt

Each congregation was asked to create one quilt square representative of their congregation.  It is envisioned that the completed project will symbolize the "coming together" of all diocesan congregations in celebration of this landmark anniversary.

Our square depicts a boat on the water with a cross on the sail, representing St. Paul’s journeys and our relationship with our Navy families.

September Vestry Notes

John Winesdorfer reported that we are accepting bids from metal working companies to construct a ventilation hood for the gas stoves to be installed in the kitchen. They are to be made of galvanized steel since it is cheaper than stainless steel. We would also like to put in a gas water heater at some point.

Terrie Remick is working on an estimated budget for 2003 that will hopefully be ready for the first cottage meeting. There is already one meeting scheduled and we’ll probably need four to six altogether.

The Diocesan Convention is November 15th and 16th at the Sea-Tac Hilton. At the convention, St. Paul’s will be officially recognized as a Jubilee Center and will receive a certificate from Bishop Warner.

Fr. Randy will be taking a sabbatical next summer and we will need to decide what to do for Sunday services while he is away. It was decided to defer this to the Liturgy and Arts Committee.

Respectfully submitted,
Jennifer Dueñas
Clerk of the Vestry

Youth

It’s coming . . . the winter High School Youth Conference (HYC) is being hosted this year by, yes, you guessed it, St. Paul’s, Bremerton, during the weekend of January 17th through 19th.

We need your help!!!

Host families from St. Paul’s and surrounding Episcopal churches are needed to house about 250 youth and youth leaders from around the diocese. The youth will be attending activities throughout the weekend at St. Paul’s and will sit with their host families on Sunday morning.

St. Paul’s has hosted HYC in the past and I know that if we all pull together we can do it again.

If you are interested in helping in any way please contact: Emily Battin, Rosemary Allen or Randy Lord-Wilkinson .

Emily Battin

Do your family and friends really need any more gadgets and knick-knacks for Christmas this year??? Give a gift that helps out a needy family somewhere else on the globe. We all know that the best gifts are good for the soul. They make you feel warm inside-whether you give or receive them.

The Heifer International project is a program for sending domestic animals and trees to parts of the world in dire need. You receive cards to send your pals saying that, in their honor, you have sent baby chicks, a flock of geese, a sheep, a goat, etc., to some family in a far place....you receive information about the workings of Heifer project, so you will know how your donation is used.  

Look for information in the Narthex on December 8th and 15th, in conjunction with the African Team Ministries Craft and Jewelry sale, about how to give and get your Christmas shopping done early!!

Come and check out the gift guide during both services and perhaps consider purchasing a water buffalo, rabbit or a tree instead of a tie or blender for the hard to find gift and make a difference in the lives of others.

Contact Arvelle Carey or Ann Horn if you have any questions.


An Evening at the Admiral Theater

We have a limited number of tickets for the "Peking Acrobats" performance on Wednesday, January 22nd at 7:00 pm. The troupe of 26 acrobats, from Peking, China is touring the Pacific Northwest and will be making a repeat performance in Bremerton. Folks of all ages will enjoy the evening.

The seats are located in the balcony of the Admiral Theatre, and we have 10 spots reserved. Tickets are $15.00. The Admiral is located at 515 Pacific Ave. in downtown Bremerton. Contact Marilyn Pantano or Ann Horn in the church office to purchase tickets.